Eternity
by Star Rhapsody
Summary: I get attached to someone, only to have them turn around and leave me forever. What was the purpose in love if it only caused pain? SessKag


AN: A sess/kag fic. I hope it's not too corny.

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.

Eternity

I always knew that there was a spark between us. It's just that I didn't know that those sparks would become fireworks. Maybe I was too inexperienced with love. Maybe I just didn't care. But I knew I did care the minute I saw her go away. The woman that I had grown to love, had told me in her own way, that it was okay to have emotions. It was okay to be yourself. It was okay to _love_. I held on to those feelings, like a lost child. I realized how much better life could be if you opened up your heart. In the end, it took me too long to realize that. I was stubborn. Ever since the loss of my dear mother, I couldn't trust anyone. Not my father, not my step-mother, and not my half-brother. At times, I believed that I couldn't even trust myself. And to this day, it remains as the solid truth. The only reason everything ended up the way it did, was because I was untrue to myself.

I can feel my heart twist into a knot everytime I think of that woman. I had grown so attached to her. Why did it have to end this way? Was it to serve as a punishment for every cruel thing I did? Yes, I was the stoic demon lord, but she changed all that. Right now, I have to admit, I'm pretty angered at everything she did, but maybe that was why I loved her. Once again, I had fallen into the emotional pit. It was like I was trapped. Sealed away from the emotion called love. Everything went wrong for me. Losing my mother, father, and then her. It was almost like life was playing some cruel, twisted game. I get attached to someone, only to have them turn around and leave me forever. What was the purpose in love if it only caused pain?

Soon, I learned that love is pain and pain is love. There was no other way around it. Back when I was the 'stone' demon lord, I never bothered to dilly dally with love. In fact, I hated even the _thought_ of caring for someone. Especially a human for that matter. I didn't grow up hating humans. Humans were just other living creatures on this earth, and I excepted it. There was no bad thought about them in my mind. But, when my mother died, everything changed on my thoughts about them. The minute my father mated with that human, I was revolted. How could that...that _thing _even be a worthy substitute for my mother? My mother was a demoness of great power, radiance, and elegance. I loved her dearly. I can even remember when I was a child that I couldn't stomach the thought of the world existing without her. Apparently, it could.

So from then on, I lived a life of solitude. Life was so dull. I don't even recall what kept me going. Stubborn pride could be one of my reasons that I still remain living.

But then, the real reason came.

Her.

Kagome was the name of the woman I had come to cherish. She was my life force. She pulled me through and gave me a new look on life. I am glad that I met her. Kagome...such an angel. How could it be that I once despised the very ground she walked on? Love was indeed the strangest thing. Reasons for hating Kagome at first, seem so petty now. At one point, those reasons were very acceptable to me. But now, they were so childish. My first reason for hating her, was the fact that she accompanied my half-brother, Inuyasha. Because I couldn't stand him, I was forced somewhere in my mind, to hate her. The second reason, was the fact that she dared to stand against me. I thought of how foolish she truly was. Protecting some half-breed. And to think, some mortal like her fending off me. Of course, further down the road, that would become one of the reasons why I had come to admire her so.

So brave, strong, and kind. She held all the qualities that an angel would possess. It was from that point on, that I realized no other demoness or human could amount up to her. She filled up the empty space in my heart that had once harbored the love for my late mother.

Although they were alike in many ways, they held their differences that made them unique. And I don't mean the physical appearances. Yes, it was obvious. One was human, one was a demoness. But below that, inside their hearts, they were different. My mother was shy, even if she was powerful, yet, Kagome was strong and brave. Though she was still modest. Kagome also was less lady-like. Until she got a little older of course. She didn't have the grace of a woman until she was 19 (in human years) or so. But that did not matter to me. Kagome was Kagome and I loved her for who she was. And I'll be honest, I'm glad that she loved for me for who I was.

Whenever I have my spare time, I can't help but think, Why did she continue to love Inuyasha, even when he still held desires for a dead woman? It was like he had her wrapped around his finger. It was disgusting. He could run to his dead woman whenever he desired, yet, she was forever bound to him. If I ever held any respect for him, it had long been diminished. It seemed impossible to get it through his thick skull, that he was hurting her. What did he see in some dead woman? I would never understand, nor would I want to. Maybe she had been an honorable priestess in the past, but she was nothing more once she was resurrected. Just a mere reminder of all the pain the past had brought. I couldn't even believe that Kagome was a reincarnation of that dead woman. I doubt she was. Kagome had told everyone so vehemently that she was no one other than herself.

And it was true. No one could ever be her. She was unique. It would almost be like a sin if anyone thought they could copy that amazing woman.

That's why I became so protective of her. I had promised to myself that I would always protect her. It had become my duty. I wanted to become her protecter, I wanted to make sure she would always remain happy, I wanted the best for her. But in the end, I wasn't good enough. No one seemed to be good enough for someone as beautiful as her. Why did I fail you Kagome...why?

And so the life of Kagome met the end of its path. Her journey had been completed in life, and I suppose it was for the best. But the way she found that path, was heartbreaking. She had gone through the loss of the man she first loved. Inuyasha. I hated to admit it, I just did. Jealousy was a normal part of having emotions, I soon found out. Not only did she go through the loss of Inuyasha, but she went through the fact that in Inuyasha's eyes, she would never amount up to anything while Kikyou was engraved, deep inside his heart.

So, in order to make the first man she loved, happy, she sacrificed herself. She gave away her soul to the dead miko, letting Inuyasha love the woman he once did, fifty years ago. I guess that was her way of relief.

"_As much as I love you, Sesshoumaru...oh gods I love that name..."_,she mumbled. "_As much as I love you...I cannot go on with my life, knowing that the man I first loved, is miserable. I think...that it would be better for me to leave this world. Let Kikyou have her soul back...let her live the life she wanted..." _I gripped her delicate hand tightly, refusing to believe what she had said. "_Why are you willing to give up your life for someone who wouldn't do the same?_", I asked, almost with bitterness. She simply smiled. The smile that had confused me so much. "_Oh Sesshoumaru...love does that to you, I suppose. Love can make anyone go crazy. But...promise me one thing._" I told her to go on with my eyes. "_Promise me...that you will out live me...no matter what..even if it will be by a day_..." The grip on her hand became tighter. "_I promise...for all eternity...that I will live on...just for you._" "_Thank you..._"she whispered to me, softly. She took out the shikon jewel that had been recently completed. I knew what her wish was. I dreaded it, but her mind was set.

And just like that...she was gone. For an eternity.

To this day, she never escapes my heart or mind. She forever resides in it. For she is the eternal angel of my dreams. She is the light at the end of every tunnel. She is the breeze that blows through the meadows. She is the river that runs through every forest.

She is the song of life.

_Love hurts_

_Life is pain_

_But in the end_

_You'll lose less than you have gained_

_-Anonymous_

AN:Well, that was the Sess/Kag fic. Hope it wasn't too sappy or boring. See ya!


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